What is 'reality'?
What is 'reality'? This question seems to be redundant to most of us. One may think that 'reality is just simply reality'. Let us use the metaphor of 'half a glass of water' to illustrate what reality is. Indeed, this metaphor has two facets of 'reality' – the half that we 'have' and the half that we 'don't have'.
We can use this metaphor of 'half a glass of water' to describe the lives of retired people. The half that we 'don't have' represents things that we have lost, such as our jobs, roles, social status, family members, friends, health, etc.; the half that we 'have' represents things that we possess, such as experience, knowledge, social network, time (since retired people do not have a full-time job after retirement, they have more personal time than before), etc. With positive thinking, retired people can focus on what they still possess and let go of what they have lost.
Taking Control of the Reality through Positive Thinking
Many people seem to have wrongly regarded 'thinking' as just 'thinking' and no matter what they think, it would not affect their lives. It is really not the case. Let us use the 'half a glass of water' metaphor again as illustration. While it may be true that the 'having' half and 'not having' half are simply a kind of thinking, they do lead to two completely different results through interactions with 'emotion' and 'behaviour'. The reason behind is that 'thinking', 'emotion' and 'behaviour' are actually three components of the cyclical psychological process. Put simply, 'thinking' triggers 'emotion', and 'emotion' initiates 'behaviour'. People who usually think about the 'not having' perspective tend to have negative emotions and passive behaviour. On the other hand, people who usually think about the one half of 'having' often have positive emotions, and their behaviour is active.
Faced with the metaphor of 'half a glass of water' in our lives, the first thing we should do is to avoid 'losing more', and positive thinking is the key to avoid 'losing more'. 'Positive thinking' helps generate positive emotion, which in turn helps us live in a more active way and hence take control of our situations effectively and prevent 'losing more'.
Creating a New Reality through Positive Thinking
Life is a dynamic process with only two possible directions: to progress or to regress. Remaining status quo is only an illusion as it is actually regression. If retired people can use their 'positive thinking' to focus on the half that they 'have', they will not only be able to control the reality, but also create the reality. Using 'positive thinking', retired people would ask themselves, "How can I make the best use of and contribute my experience, knowledge, social network and time?" Such kind of positive thinking has indeed helped many retired people set higher goals for their lives, ignite passion in their hearts and drive them forward, resulting in further contributions to themselves, their families and the society and thus creating a happy and fulfilling retirement life.
Dr Wong Chung-kwong, JP
Chairman of Honorary Advisory Board
Whole Person Development Institute